Disclaimer:  The Story of Christy is owned the Marshall-LeSoard Family. 

We are in no way seeking profit or credit for her story. This fiction is written 

for our own amusement only. This story is themes from the book, CBS series, 

and the PAX series.

A Heart Full of Winter

Written by: Bobbi Burger

My cousin Christy works at Cutter Gap Mission. She has invited me and my 

children to live close by. I haven't answered her letter. I packed up the children 

and headed to her.

My name is Sarah MacBairde. My family is Irish. We moved to the Americas

when my great grandpa was a wee boy. He passed the stories and songs down

to us. I am passing it on to my wee bairns.

My man was no good and left. So the wee ones and I face the world alone. Cousin

Christy's letter was heaven sent.

That's why we are walking up the side of a mountain in the cold of winter with

snowflakes slowly falling around us.

That's me and my four younguns. Mitchell is a strong, smart boy who has

been a little man most of his nine years. Caleb at eight looks almost a twin

to his big brother and tries so hard to keep up with him. Mary and Madeline

at seven have not been apart since they were born. Twins usually are close.

As I look around I see the snow is falling faster and the wind is picking up. 

What can I do? Maybe I should have waited for winter too get over but more

months living in the poorhouse was to hard to face for us all. The children

hardly smiled anymore.. No place to play and my long hours of work was

taking the life and joy out of us.

This long cold walk was putting the Irish spirit back into us. I could see the

worry and strain leaving their beautiful faces.

But the wind is so strong and the snow is falling so fast I can hardly see. I gather

the younguns tight to me as I look behind for some kind of shelter. Nothing in

any direction but trees and snow. I couldn't have seen shelter even if there had

been. All I could do was keep to the trail and keep us moving.

I turn back and there stands a man. Hat down on his head, hair to his collar, 

beard hanging out of his raggedy coat, but there was kindness in his eyes. I was

not frightened when he picked up Mary, took Madeline by the hand and started up

over the side of the mountain.

There was a path that only deer or rabbits knew about. Somehow though 

this man knew exactly where he was. Mitchell and Caleb started to follow 

and I stepped in behind them.

The man continued on up and up through the woods. Having no problems at

all as the snow got deeper and deeper. The boys were helping me as I struggled

to stay up with my long skirts. He was carrying Mary and leading Madeline and

he was not having one bit of trouble.

All  of a sudden there we were standing beside a cabin. He took us in. A fire

was burning in the fireplace.

He put Mary down and let go of Madeline, then he put more wood on the fire.

He motioned toward a wooden trunk and went out the door. I looked in the

trunk and found women's clothes. Everything I needed to get out of my wet

clothes. I found enough camisoles in the bottom to get my babies warm to.

We had just finished dressing when he came back in. He was carrying a frozen

chunk of meat.

I looked around and saw a frying pan. I picked it up and set it in the red coals

in the fireplace. A fat chunk lay close by on a small stand with a very sharp knife.

 I stuck the knife in the fat and ran it around the fry pan. Then I started slice the

meat, as I sliced I placed it in  the pan. Already it was smelling good. Deer meat

was delicious. I mixed some flour, salt, eggs, a bit of lard, and water, and put it in

another skillet. I set that skillet in the red coals and put the lid on it. I covered the

lid with red coals. It would be done baking and we could have biscuits and deer

meat. Fried meat was scrumptious inside hot biscuits.

The children were happily sitting close the fire playing with the few toys they had.

 A few wooden horses, wagons,  and men for the boys. A doll of wood for each girl.

 I had made a couple dresses for their dolls and one blanket each. It wasn't much but

it kept them busy and happy.

For three days he had been bringing food in and I cooked it. The night of the third

day the snow stopped.

This morning he handed us our capes and we followed him through the snow. It was

cold but beautiful. It crackled under our feet as we tried to keep in his tracks.

As we came out of the woods I looked out over the most beautiful white snow scene

I had ever seen. There was a church with a bell in the tower, and a big roomy house.

He took us to the door of the house. It was opened by a lady dressed in a black skirt,

 white shirt, black coat and hat.

The man looked at the lady and spoke the first words I had heard him say, " Miss Alice,

I found these on the Cutter Gap road the day it started snowin".

"Thank thee Birds-eye.. Would thee like a cup of coffee to warm thee up?"

"No thank ya Mam."

With that he turned and was gone. As quickly and quietly as he had showed

up he now disappeared.

We went in and were introduced to the young preacher, Mr. David Grantland. 

Miss Alice already knew who we were. Christy had told her all about me and my

younguns. I felt her love right away. It was so good after years of hurt to find

someone who cared without me having to be what they wanted. I could be myself.

"Christy and Neil are out among the mountain people doctoring," said Miss Alice;

"they could be a couple of days. We have plenty of room here at the mission.

 Thee and thy children may stay in the mission. If thee wants to, thee could work

in the mission and thee and thy children could live here instead of getting a cabin."

"Thank you Miss Alice, we would really enjoy that. I c am able to cook and clean

and sew. I play the piano. I can help out where you need me. And the children can

finely start back to school."

So we settled down for a long winter.

I thought about the man - Birds-eye- as I did dishes or sat sewing. He had been so

nice. I wondered what had happened in his life. Why did he have those clothes at

his place? Why didn't he talk"? Why was he alone?

Christy and Miss Alice made sure I wasn't lonely. Christy was trying to get me

and Mr. Grantland to be more than friends.

I explained to her that I did not want to be more than a friend. My heart was as

cold as the winter outside. After the way my man had with the heat was very

sweaty at times. It was something Christy had learned to deal with her first year

in the school. Being from the country I had grown up with it and didn't even notice it.

I would go to the school after the daily chores at the mission were done. I found

some excuse to make a treat or some sort of snack for the school as often as possible.

 So many of the children had hardly anything to eat, I knew mountain pride forbid

them to take charity or be beholden to anyone. But if it was something for the whole

school, or a party of some kind, they couldn't politely refuse.

We had spelling bees every Friday night. We always had sandwiches, cake, pies,

and cider.  I got to know the different parents. I have always been shy so I sat quietly

and took it all in.

I would dance with my children on the edge of the crowd. The Irish spirit in me had

to move to the music. When the singing was going on I was happily singing right along.

Christy and some of the other women were trying to get me and Jeb Spencer together.

I liked Jeb and enjoyed his singing. His wife had died from the fever. His children

liked me. I liked them. Jeb Spencer was a fine man but I couldn't feel anything in my

heart towards him.

My heart was still as frozen as the white crusted snow outside. I enjoyed everything

I did at Cutters Gap. All the work at the mission. Helping Christy at the school.

I was happy. I loved my children   and the school children. I had many friends

among the womenfolk of the gap. But when it came to men I wouldn't let anyone

close to me.

I went with Neil a few times. I even taught him a couple of remedies my Gran

had taught me. Being a doctor in the mountains was hard work. Neil didn't have

the medicines that city doctors used. He made due with whatever he could.

He used herbs and roots, barks, teas, poultices, and whatever medicine he

could get sent to him. The medicine companies didn't always think about the

mountain people. A few companies would give Neil some free things to help.

But it was hard to get the people to let him use them. They were a headstrong

people and it took a lot of work to get them to change their ways. Neil having

grown up with them knew this. He knew I had been raised this way also.

That was why he took me along to help on some calls where he knew he

would need an extra hand.

I had helped with an axe cut on a leg. Took care of five little boys while their

ma gave birth to a girl. Miss Alice had come in then and stayed for a week till

the lady was on her feet again. I helped  him with an operation handing him the

tools he needed.  Held a small girl that fell in the fireplace. Both hands were burned.

Every day she stopped by the mission on her way to school and I would put salve

and new bandages on them.

After the long cold of the winter it was exciting to look forward to spring.

A party was planned for the end  of April. We had gotten word out among

the people by the mountain telegraph, tell one person and it spreads like

wildfire. Each family was planing on bringing food. After a hard winter of

not much we would be having a feast. There would be music, dancing,

and singing.

I made new clothes for me and the children. Mitchell looked very handsome

in his dark blue shirt. Caleb looked more like a little gentleman in his bright

red shirt. Mary had a light yellow dress, Madeline had light purple. They looked

like little angels to me.

I had found a dark green that brought out the auburn in my hair and made

my eyes shine.. The children said I was beautiful. I felt like a queen as we

 walked over to the schoolhouse that Saturday afternoon.

My burdens had grown lighter over the long winter of fun. I had enjoyed the

hard work. I loved the mountain people and I loved their mountain. They had

accepted us as part of their family. We  would  live here forever.

I was happy as a newborn pup standing in the schoolhouse.

I looked around and his eyes met mine. He slowly came across floor between

all the dancing people. When he got in front of me I looked up at him.

"I been thinkin bout ya all winter long. Will ya be my wife?"

The ice in my heart melted. Spring had come to my heart as it was coming

to Cutter Gap.

With tears running down my face I said "Yes."

The music stopped and we looked around. Everyone was smiling.

We stepped over to David Grantland.

"Will ya marry us Preacher?"

We were married right there with all our friends around.

When Preacher said "Amen" Birds-eye and I turned around. Mitchell,

Caleb, Mary, and  Madeline all hugged their new pa as tight as they could.

Birds-eye's heart melted to as he hugged them back.

I could read Christy's happy face. She was thinking;" I told you just let it

in God's hands and He'll make a way."

I sure was glad God had taken winter from my heart.